more good times with my lovers

Hiking and snowboarding weren't the only fun adventures we had in Utah..

We always love going on walks to the end of our street. Nikole brings her dogs, we all chat and catch up, get some fresh air and end up at the top of the gully were you have the greatest view of Alpine. It's the best. 

Walmart runs. Duh.

Chuck a Rama, it's tradition.

We went and saw The Croods and The Host, which were soo good but I couldn't help but get a little excited over my favorite movie coming back in 3D!!

Girly time.. we so pretty.

Made some new friends at church.

Nikole gave me this awesome letter.

I found this beauty while I was shopping with Laur. I saw something similar on pinterest, but it was kinda ghetto so when I saw this I couldn't say no. It's exactly what I've been looking for, yay!

We got some family pictures done at this cool location, and Colton couldn't help but get too close to all the broken buildings. There were wild animals, nails sticking out of loose boards, random holes in the earth, barbed wire fences, ect.. thankfully we could keep up with this silly boy so we made it through the session without any injuries. Phew!

Ha Khloe couldn't take her eyes off the pretty little ponies.

I love those chubby cheeks!

I never get enough of this boy. 

See yawls in a couple of weeks!! xo

What a day

Zack loves the idea of homeschooling our children one day. He wants them to grow up on a boat while sailing around the world. He wants them to experience life and learn about business first hand. (I'm pretty sure Zack hated school haha). We always joke argue about this. I for one loved going to school, but I think my friends were the ones to thank for that. 

Anywho, after everything that's happened in the past year homeschool sounds perfect. With all the public shootings and now the Boston marathon bombing, I'm not sure I feel all that safe anymore. Who knows what will be happening by the time we start having kids. 

My sister Jess is the marathon queen. She almost made it to Boston this year and now I'm so thankful she didn't. We all would have been there cheering her on by the finish line. I can't imagine what it would be like to be there in person and see so many injured people fighting for their lives. Seeing the pictures and news footage from today made me cry. I feel so sad for everyone who has been affected by this tragedy. I really hope that everyone who was injured/lost someone will be able to pull through.

Lots of prayers for Boston today.

Also- young girl from Provo is missing. That's got to be every parents worst fear. It's been amazing though to see everyone sharing her picture and description. I hope more than anything that they can bring this little girl home safely.

It's comforting knowing that there are still so many good people out there. It's amazing to see complete strangers step up when disaster hits and turn into someone's hero. I heard a story from Boston today about these ladies who were in one of the buildings that was blasted by a bomb. They were near some children when it happened, who quickly asked them if a bad man had done this. They could see how scared the children were, so they tried to comfort them by saying it was just some fireworks that had accidentally gone off inside. Then they ran with these children in their arms until they were blocks away from the danger. 

It's hard feeling safe sometimes, when so many bad things keep happening. I don't want to live in fear or worry myself to death, because really what good does that do? I think the only thing you can do is cherish every wonderful day, do the things the make you happy and spend time with the people you love. 

xoxo

Inspiration

I always need a little bit of this Monday morning.

PCMR

Aww I'm so happy I got to ride at Park City again! It's always been my favorite resort.

I went riding solo dolo while everyone else was at work/school and it was actually tons of fun. I explored the mountain just going whichever way looked exciting, without thinking about where I was going to end up. I even found this little half pipe and ran into Neff Land, which was SO fun! I had the most zen day ever. 

Also I had the weirdest conversation with this guy who had to have been on some kind of wack drugs while we were riding up the ski lift. First he begins by asking me if I was texting (because I was looking at my phone) so I told him no I was just taking a picture.. So then he starts asking about the different texting acronyms and he somehow turned that conversation into a philosophy lesson. Weird, but I went with it to be nice. I thought maybe he was just very very passionate about philosophy, so why not let him rant? Well after zoning in and out of what he was saying he says, "so how can you prove to me that you are real and not actually part of my wildest fantasy??" Woahh. Thankfully I had been paying a little attention to his "lesson" so I knew how to answer without letting him get even creepier. When I answered correctly he was very happy and then wished me a great day! But we still had a few more minutes before we were off the lift so we sat there awkwardly in silence. HA. Oh boy.

After riding I met up with Jill and we got lunch at this nice pizza place called Vino I think.. DELISH! It's always so fun hanging out with Jill, even if we only have time for lunch.

holy effff

I've written so many blog posts over the last two weeks, about some of the things I've been going through, but I keep deleting them because I don't want this space I've created to be negative. But then I realized, it' okay to write about how I'm feeling- good or bad because this is my blog :)

So where do I even begin? 

You know that pretty picture you dream up in your head of how your life is going to turn out? Well after 22 years of imagining, spiritually creating and planning out my life.. everything changed when I married the love of my life.

For about two years now we've living in California. I wake up and see the beautiful ocean everyday. My once straight hair is now a curly mess that has to be contained to a braid or ponytail because it's so humid. I'm not working for the first time 7 years. I went from taking classes at a university to a city college. I have zero friends my own age. I've lost touch with my comfort zone. I'm going to school for a degree I'm never going to use, but its something I want for me, I can't explain it. I'm in the best place spiritually that I've ever been, yet I feel more judged than I did when I wasn't so strong. I'm experiencing life in a way I never imagined.

I'm happier than ever and at the same time more confused than I've ever been in my entire life. I know that I have to let go of my own plan in order for God's to take place. It's just hard waiting for an answer sometimes, when I feel so lost.

I literally have no idea where Zack and I will be in 1, 2 or even 10 years but I do know that Heavenly Father has a plan for us, and that as long as we stay on that path, we will be blessed infinitely.

Even though I have faith that we are here in California for a reason.. Somedays I can't help but what wonder WHAT THE HECk am I doing here?? (or most days for that matter)

Life is crazy. It throws you curve balls. Turns your world  upside down, but all you can do is keep moving forward.

Have you heard that quote by Carl Sagan, "I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way." That's basically my life.

I believe that Santa Barbara is where Zack and I are supposed to be right now, but living here is SO hard.

I feel like ever since I've been here I've been fighting to stay myself. Maybe it's just a Santa Barbara thing, but I've literally been expected to fit into this cookie cutter mold that these people have created. I'm expected to have these old lady hobbies, spend more time doing relief society activities than spend time with my husband, stop talking to all my Utah friends and family and MOVE ON from them to become friends with all of these people who could care less about me, ECT.. Get it?

I'm expected to be THEM, not ME, not me at all!

No thanks :)

.. and that my friends, is exactly why I don't really have any friends in California. 

* BUT the couple of friends I do have here are complete gems! I'm soo thankful to have them in my life!!! *

So let me just tell you that the last two weeks have been madness! Complete madness. It's been eye opening and life altering, for good and for bad. I have this new sense of freedom.. I don't know how else to explain it.

You know those times in life when something bad happens 10 more sucky things just happen to hit all at once. Yeah? Well I feel like I'm drowning in them right now. To say its been a hard couple of weeks is an understatement.

For one, I got some really really bad news. I was heartbroken. It's not something I want to share on here, but the important thing is that after a lot of faith and prayer things have started  looking up in the most amazing ways! I can't even believe it.

Another thing that happened that really sent me over the edge was when someone "close" to me who should be treating me like family, completely insulted my actual family. Plus it wasn't the first time they had insulted them either! UGH.

Not to mention I've heard this person gossip nasty things about me, make judgements about me, exclude me from things, ect.. But hearing them insult my FAMILY for what, like the 5th time now just really got to me. 

WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOME PEOPLE? How can someone be so rude over and over and over? The worst part is that everyone praises this person and comes up to me ALL the time telling me how lucky I am to have them in my life. HA! If they only knew...

Maybe this happens because I've been too nice to fight back? I hate confrontation. But, from now on I'm being brave. I'm not going to let people be rude for no good reason anymore, unless they wanna hear what I think about it. Is it California, Santa Barbara, or just the people in my life here? 

Holy freaking crap. Right? Ahh.

Thankfully I have an amazing husband who takes the best care of me and makes me feel so loved all the time. I would be so lost without him!!! 

I have the most wonderful family and friends who I completely adore! They are worth every mile and we're going to continue traveling back and forth between CA and UT so that we can spend time with them :) It's not everyday you find great people that are worth keeping in your life, so we truly cherish the ones we have!

The Y

Friends who hike together stay together. Right? Yeah, something like that. Jessica, Jamie, Kate and I hiked up to the Y the other day. It was steep and hot, but amazing once we got up top, like it always is. 

Ahh spring time in Utah is the best!